How to Start A Conversation and Make Social Moments More Comfortable

Do you know how to start a conversation with someone you’ve never met before? Or that person who has become an acquaintance, but with whom you are not intimate? Many may think that there is nothing wrong with this situation, but there are those who feel extremely uncomfortable in everyday social interactions.

Starting and maintaining a conversation can be a source of great anxiety. After all, how do you know what the other person is thinking? The discomfort of those who are socially anxious is not actually related to the other or the environment, but to themselves.

In this post, you will understand why some people get stressed when interacting with others and how to reduce discomfort in social interactions.

Why is it hard to know how to start a conversation?

Conversation is the exchange of information, courtship and opinions between two or more people. In some cultures, “chatting” is highly valued.

In the United States, for example, small talk is practiced excessively between acquaintances and strangers. The approach begins with a compliment or a comment about the weather, developing into a conversation about the day’s tasks, the neighborhood where you live, work, among other subjects.

The words come easily and fit together so perfectly that the subject feels like it will never end, even if it’s a brief conversation. However, not everyone masters this fluidity of speech.

For people who are anxious, shy, or very introverted , knowing exactly how to start a conversation is a challenge. Thoughts pile up inside their heads, making them nervous during a social moment. The apparent nervousness ends up getting in the way of SharekAlomre your conversations and sometimes preventing friendship or affective bonds from developing.

“What comments to make?”. “Why to do if the other person frowns?”. “What if she ignores me?” and “Will I bother?” are some examples of anxious thoughts that harm the social interactions of this group of individuals.

They are caused, above all, by anxiety. Through it negative feelings and emotions are manifested, such as pessimism, insecurity, fear of judgment and shame. So just reflect about how to start a conversation becomes a problem of massive proportions.

How to Start A Conversation and Make Social Moments More Comfortable

Obstacles to Socialization – How to Start A Conversation

If you fall into the group of individuals who can’t talk to others, don’t worry. People who have difficulty socializing often feel bad about being socially inept. Unpleasant comments (“Weird”, “Stuck” and “Clumsy”) contribute to the fixation of negative opinions.

But not knowing how to interact with others is a very common problem, shared by thousands of people. You may simply be a more introspective person who prefers to How to Start A Conversation observe and contemplate rather than participate. There’s nothing wrong with that .

When talking becomes exhausting and a reason to avoid meeting anyone outside the safe environment of home, that awkwardness becomes a problem.

Like it or not, we live in a society that needs constant exchange of favors so that survival is guaranteed. Knowing how to start a conversation is not just a matter of cordiality , but of forming useful connections to survive, grow and prosper.

Next, look at the main obstacles to healthy socialization. They will help you to identify which elements are present in your life.

Extremely shy people don’t know how to start a conversation with someone they don’t know, even when they need to interact with someone else to solve a problem. When she manages to maintain a connection, she feels nervous until the end of the conversation and doesn’t say what she would have liked to say.

The fear of other people’s judgment ends up affecting their relationships, professional and academic performance, and even their enjoyment of life.

Social phobia – How to Start A Conversation

Social phobia is the fear and anxiety of being exposed to certain social contexts, resulting in isolation or avoidance. The person with this phobia fears being humiliated and feels ashamed simply for being who they are . . The worry is so intense that it accompanies physical symptoms such as shortness of breath, sweating, dizziness, tremors, and retching.


Agoraphobia is similar to social phobia, only focused on the fear of being in public or busy places without a possibility of escape in sight. This disorder leads How to Start A Conversation to social isolation and, in severe cases, the fear of leaving one’s home.

Places that can lead to an anxiety crisis are: markets, malls, queue of crowded establishments (bank, bakery at peak hours), theater, cinema, classroom, among others.


Pathological anxiety makes the daily lives of people who suffer from it less fruitful, joyful and productive. That’s because it promotes emotional clutter and thought disconnection, turning simple activities into daunting challenges.

It also hinders social interactions and the deepening of friendship bonds. As the person cannot communicate properly, he/she starts to avoid moments of socialization that generate discomfort.

Panic Syndrome – How to Start A Conversation

Panic Syndrome causes sudden anxiety attacks, increasing the discomfort of the person with panic in social environments. That way, she starts How to Start A Conversation spending more time at home and avoiding friends and family so she doesn’t encounter triggers .

Low self esteem

The lack of self-esteem generates problems that spread to several areas of life. A person with low self-esteem cannot relate to others because. They think they are inferior. the think they are ugly. Think they are uninteresting, among dozens of other defects that live only in their head.

RELATED ARTICLE: Why are We Afraid of Love?

How to start a conversation?

Starting a conversation is not as difficult as it sounds. It’s not scary either.

Although there are people who notice behavior and appearance with meticulous attention, most do not care about these details. The content of speech and the quality of sensations provided by interactions are more important. These are the elements that will stay in other people’s memories.

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